Wo(a)ndering thoughts!!!

My dear pre-teen,  Part of me wants you to stay young and innocent, but life gets to us all and you grow, and I have to grow as well. First, I want to thank you for putting up with me and my parental demands. You take me by surprise every single day with your patience, focus, attitude, and how you face challenges that are thrown at you. I’m so grateful to watch you grow the way you are growing with kindness, satirical sarcasm, to-the-point-arguments, your excitement to be involved in every adult conversation, and your logical and strategic thinking- you are the best ‘IDEA’ man I know in this world. Thanks for teaching me how to reach for the moon and stars.  This is going to be a big year where you are going to face your first breakups and first ‘goodbyes’ to the wonderful community of friends you grew up with. I don’t know how much you can understand that now, with some of your friends- this might be it. I hope you appreciate their presence in your life and the im...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Two of my work got selected in a poetry competition run by Greater Dandenong Council, Victoria. Both  Here and There  and Nostalgia got   published in a poetry book titled "HOME".   "Home" is a collection of work by talented individuals from different background. My piece here talks about nostalgic memories that  I call home.                                                       ----------------------------------------------------- My heart is still in that hot summer when I was 6, I played with my cousins climbing trees, Innocence, laughs and sour mangoes kept me going.. My heart is still in that hot summer when I was 10, I tricked my friends to see who could hold the breath longest, the cool dip, hot sun and water games kept me going.. My heart is still in that hot summer when I was 14, I play...

I used to be a vampire, Staying up all late and going to classes next day without a fuss. I never understood why people cry at the cinemas for a scene, Duh! It’s just a movie. Never had time to notice simple things, Life was an adrenaline ride. Taking risk without thinking about consequence was the “norm.” I had an “agenda” for my career. If you wonder, how can it all change after a tiny creature entered into your life. Forget about seeing an emotional scene from a movie, even hearing a normal conversation from a random stranger can make me cry now. Forget about staying awake till midnight, just 5 minutes past 9 is all I can do now. Realized little things have a power to brighten your day, Cuddle and a kiss can take away all stress.. Forget about that career agenda, any job that gives me “Me time” will do. Forget about adrenaline, sending a snack with "traces of nuts" is my biggest risk right now. Priorities have changed, Thought pr...

Life isn’t fair, To my friend who was ambitious in high school, got married, dropped out of collage, gave birth to a beautiful child, her high dreams taunted her,  She felt suffocated, She thought she was a failure,   One day, she took her life just like that..  Life is unfair To her baby boy,  He was told it was a sign of bad omen that took his mother's life, he started life with humiliation with no mistakes of his own,  Life isn’t fair To anyone. No one is left alone here,  If you are special, you will be treated worse in the unfair world,  why me you may ask, because you are special.

In an ideal world: You pick a place for family vacay or decide it together, family gets excited and pinch in ideas with excitement!! My world: I pick a place, make list of things to do, prepare a business case with costing/flight options etc.,  and then, sit down to discuss it with my boys!! PC:Google Images <Excepted reaction after hearing the name of the place: Jumping in excitement or just a facial reaction i.e smile or least show me a smiley emoji . I’m easy to please. > In reality, all I get is A:   “But why??  there are volcanos.. What happens if we get stuck there.. I rather go to holiday program and stay home!!!” Me: Volcanos does not erupt just like that, we will have plenty of time to fly out.. Ok listen!! We could go swimming with dolphins!!! Isn’t exciting!! A: but you don’t know swimming!! Me: Ok!! You know what!!!   I have decided I’m going on a family vacay to the planned place I wrote that business ...

I'm finishing up my series on  10 days of gratitude with a special post. Last but not the least is Happiness. Happiness is Waking up to sound of a chirping bird, walking in silence before a busy day, sipping hot chai after a nap, cuddling inside a cozy comforter, smell of rain, laughing with dear ones, listening to soulful music, singing karaoke with A, Spending time worthy with someone, goss with friends, going on a long drive, Home. This is a special post not because its last in the series, it is special because my cheeky monkey(6yr old) wants to add his thoughts too Happiness for A is,  playing street cricket on summer days, going to after-school-care, McD's ice cream, eating Chocolates, pancakes on Sunday, Friday night movie night, cooking with mom, Trick ta to carry me, board games, being naughty, penguin kisses, Love. I'm so grateful for last 10 days to pen down things that Im thankful for. Looking back, I strongly feel I'm...

This is part of my series on  10 days of gratitude.   In no particular order, 9th in my list is  Ignorance . Ignorance is bliss, you know why? more I know, more I feel disappointed. more I want to prove, more I struggle. more I ignore people more inner peace. more I focus on whats needed, more I don't care. Ignorance is bliss, you know why? it keeps me sane. PC:Google Images I'm really grateful for my ignorance especially when it comes to people..Insecure people try their best to get to me, I'm trying not to react. I have to tell myself, its  not me. It is tiring, it takes great toll on my energy, it takes time and practice.. But I'm trying. I'm thankful for my mindfulness to find ways out. Grateful for those people who keep reminding me that it is not me. Check out my other posts on  10 days of gratitude , D ay 10: Happiness Day 8: Life as it comes Day 7:Taken for granted Day 6: Wanderlust Day 5: The little things Day 4:...

This is my 8th day on 10 days of gratitude posts until Christmas, this post is 8 . Life as it comes. " What do you want to be when you grow up ?" My grandpa asked me when I was 8 yrs old. I think I said I want to be dancer. Little did I know, I had to learn first to become one. At 17, I didn't had any choice other than to join 'Engineering' , I thought I'm done with schooling after 4yrs. Little did I know, ' Just Engineering ' is not enough. "Mom, I got my US Visa"  I called my mom from a phone booth outside embassy, I had no idea why I was doing what I was doing. Little did I know, I was taking a big step in life. At 24, I didn't know a thing about this faraway land down under, I quit my job and said goodbye to dear ones. Little did I know, life changes for good. At 30, we moved to a country with open return ticket due to political situation. With 1yr old along side and 14 bags I landed in a new country alone. Li...

I'm writing a ten day series on 10 things that I'm grateful for. This is my 7th day and I'm grateful for everything - its about T aken for  Granted . He stinks!! I see him everyday. He sits outside 7-11 and has a paper next to him that says ‘ Help me ’. His cloths are dirty and his pants are too low from the back. Probably he needs a shower, clean cloths and a proper meal. I’m not judging him, he has other problems too - finding a toilet, and he uses this dirty plastic bottle to refill water to drink. He sits on different side of the platform everyday but around the same big building. it doesn't matter whether it is 3 deg or 39 deg outside, he sits somewhere on the sidewalk. And probably sleeps there too. Things that I take for granted on everyday ground from clean water, a clean cloths, a warm food, comfy bed, toilet etc., is someone else's luxury.  I'm not going to feel better just because it is not me sitting there. It could be me too. Lif...

This is part of my series for 10 days of gratitude.   In no particular order, 4th in my list is Memories . PC:Google images My granny used to tell me about the day I was born, she would've told me that many a times, I'd never got tired of it, It got better and better every time I heard it. I can recall my summer holidays spent with my cousins, I just want to go back and freeze those moments, I have it even framed in my mind. Its been years since I met my best friends from collage, but it never feels like I miss them, every time we speak it feels so fresh, we get older but in our memories, we are still in our twenties. I'm thankful for all the memories I cherish from every frame of my life. People come and go, however the imprint they leave in our lives stay forever.  Check out my other posts on  10 days of gratitude , Day 5: The little things Day 3:The Imperfections Day 2:Patience Day 1: My Anxiety

Third in my series on 10 days of gratitude is The   Imperfections .. I don't have a perfect nail, I don't have a perfect hair, I don't have a perfect toned body, I don't have a perfect life!! I rather have a half polished nails, that reminds of the good times I had with my little one doing 'crafts', I rather cancel my hair appointment, and settle for a book. I rather be curvy, and indulge in food trails. I rather make mistakes to learn some lessons, I'm happy being perfectly imperfect!! I’m thankful for all the imperfections in my life.. Check out my other posts on  10 days of gratitude , Day 5: The little things Day 4: Memories Day 2:Patience Day 1: My Anxiety

I had a good friend, her name was 'Tasty fatty Food'(TFF), she was my everything..She was even my bae.. She was there when I'm happy, she was there when I'm sad and depressed. She was there when I watch TV and she would be right there when I'm bored. She was my everything.. Trust me, I never felt so much comfortable in anyone's company like hers. she is the best and she always makes me feel best.. Then I hit mid-thirties, I met this new friend - he loves to call himself 'Healthy eating(HE)'..I have to live with him for obvious reasons but I think we don't get along that well(Shh!!Don't tell him).. We have reached a point where I just  ignore him some days.. then I feel real guilty , I try and give every chance to be a good friend again. Somedays I miss my old friend, I try to meet her secretly and I call it my 'Cheat day'.. I swear I don't do many cheat days.. I'm really not that guilty.. I only do cheat days, Whe...

Where would we be without tomorrows? What we’d have instead are todays. And if that was the case, with you, I’d hope for the longest day for today . I’d fill today with you, doing everything I’ve ever loved. I’d laugh, I’d talk, I’d listen and learn, I’d love, I’d love, I’d love. I’d make every day today and spend them all with you, and I’d never worry about tomorrow, when I wouldn’t be with you. And when that dreaded tomorrow comes for us, please know that I didn’t want to leave you, or be left behind, that every single moment spent with you were the best times in my life.”  ―  Cecelia Ahern ,   How to Fall in Love Beautifully written lines, don't you agree.. I just loved it when I read it recently.. I couldn't stop reading it again and again.. Talking about falling in love, its that time of the year again when the whole world gets ready for their swim wears and tanned body.. Down under we get our winter coats and jackets ready.. Flip flops and summer dresses are ...

Yesterday I SAW my neighbour after maybe 2 or 3 months, I hate to blame my work-life/ gloomy winter & shorter days etc., but basic things like 'seeing or talking to a neighbour'  become an activity or to-do list these days..  I'm really hoping summer will change this. Winter days are short, I leave home when its dark and reach home when after it gets dark.. After our usual greetings .. She asked me  'Do I miss my Korean life?'. I said I do, especially the support system I had  there with other expats/mothers. I always had company for coffee/lunch/go for trekking/swimming. Never once I felt alone.. Life was simple there, I didn't feel guilty for not working. Forget about the financial stress, I'm talking more about my own sanity. I really wish I have my friends from Korea live here, so I can hang out with them often. Returning back to Australia last yr, I couldn't stay home for even 3 months to setup our home here. Literally depressing, most of ...